I Am Still Winning

The past few weeks have been a blur.

I am so busy between work, Peanut, and training that I have very little time for much else. I mean I feel like I am constantly running around like a chicken without a head. Without a purpose.

Do you ever get so over whelmed that nothing seems to make sense anymore?

I do.

What do I do to combat it? To stay on track with life?

I remind myself that I am still winning. I remind myself that I can run fast when I want to. I take myself out for a nice run and just enjoy the weather.

I did that today. I went for a run and took some time just listening to my music. I zoned out for a nice hour and it felt good. This is my favorite time of year to run. The leaves are turning beautiful hues of red, orange and yellow. The air. Oh the lovely autumn air it smells crisp and clean. I swear you can smell the leaves dying and falling if you spend enough time outside. The sun warms your skin as the cool air keeps your body cooler while running outside. This is what I live for, to run in the fall.

After a time like that, I feel like no matter what I am still winning.

I am winning because, I have changed my life for the better. I am winning because I wake up with a smile on my face each day. I love who I see when I look in the mirror. I know in my heart, what I am doing is all for the best. I know that the choices I have made in the last 3 years have left me without regret, and have made me stronger. I also know that no matter what, I have love in my eyes when I gaze at my daughter. She changed my life and was the catalyst for me getting healthy and fit. And now I know that I have to stay strong to support her and be a good example for her.

When things get really tough, I remind myself of all that I have been through. I remind myself of all those who thought I would never get to where I am today. I think about those who have put me down in the past again and again. I think about how determined I am to prove every single one of them wrong. I smile when I run because many said I never could or would. I smile when I succeed because I know that it is through my hard work and dedication that have allowed me to get to where I am.

My friend sent me that and it made sense to me.

I am strong. I have often said I am a fighter. I will keep fighting. Yes I am still winning and being strong is helping me to keep winning. I know that no matter where my road may twist and turn onto and around, that I am strong and I will always take the road that keeps me true to myself and what my heart says.

My 31 Mile Run This Weekend

I am not sure if I will be able to focus on much of anything else for the next few week!!

Because in 33 days I will be setting out to run. Not just any run, an ultra marathon. A 50 mile run to be exact :)

So yesterday I set out to run my last longest run before the race. My training plan called for a 50k so I knew I would spend the whole day running. I decided to go back to my favorite bike path in Lexington I know that path well now and I knew it would be perfect for this run. Who can argue with views like these?

I feel so lucky to live in such a beautiful state where the Autumn brings such a visual treat for the eyes.

I really used this run as a dress rehearsal for Stonecat. I ate what I will before the race the day before. I tracked it all. I ate breakfast like normal and even snuck in a protein shake before I started. It was all a good combination but I forgot about one thing.

Calories while I run. So I switched to pure honey last weekend instead of shot blocks and it worked well. For the first time ever I did not get nauseousat all during or after my long runs. The problem I had beginning this run was I did not take in enough honey in the beginning. I took out a small honey bear in my fuel belt and had only a few sips here and there.

I had trouble getting going. Luckily I treated this just like Stonecat. The course is a 12.5 mile loop, so I looped back after the first 12.5 miles to my car and got some fuel. I finally have my food all figures out while I'm running too. This has been a lot of rehearsing as well. Being dairy, gluten and now completely grain free to reduce my inflammation from RA it has been a challenge fueling on long runs. I am not the ultra runner who can eat a pbj at a rest atop lol

So I had sweet potato wedges baked in cinnamon, hard boiled eggs, and banana pumpkin baby food packets. Those little organic ones that come in a sip tube work perfect! Last weekend I ate a banana and while it helps I burped it up for a few miles. But the puréed ones work perfect. That combination worked and I had much more energy the second loop out.

The miles kept ticking away and I was happy that the rain that haunted me during the first loop had subsided by the second loop. I got my pace back into a respectable 9 minute mile and just gutted it out. I honestly did not really get into this run like I like until mile 16. The first 26 felt like a complete chore. But by mile 17 I was singing and crusing along. I got into the sub 9 pace I like to train at and I felt in control once again.

I felt that feeling I get when I am enjoying a run. I feel like an athlete when the miles tick away easily and I am really enjoying it. I was grateful because in those first 16 miles I had begun to get discouraged. It is amazing how mid long run the feelings can shift and success can creep in. By the end of the second loop at mile 25ish I was feeling so strong.

I grabbed some more food and headed back out. Unfortunatly it was getting late and I began to get upset. I knew I would have to cut the run short at 31 miles. I had to go pick up my daughter at 7:30. So I began to pick up the pace a bit. I felt great. I knocked out a few 8 minute even miles. I never imagined a few months ago that after running 26 miles I would have legs for 8 minute miles, but I did! I felt amazing. At mile 31 when I had to stop I was all fired up. I wanted to keep going. I know, that I will be ready for the 50 miler now. I have the confidence that my body can handle the miles!

I love when I can end a run with that feeling inside, one of accomplishment and confidence. Every single time I knock out a long run like this it just makes me fall in love with running distances even more. In fact, I cam to a conclusion while I was out there running yesterday....

I have a new goal for the spring time!!!!!

A 100 mile race.

I know crazy........ BUT I love running. I do. I have contemplated what my next move will be for awhile, do I focus on getting faster, do I go to triathlons, but every single time I complete a long run like this, I have to focus on what my heart is telling me. And it says, RUN. I can run for hours and hours and be in love with it still. I feel like it is exactly what I was made to do.

So help me now I would love to find a 100 miler sometime after the Boston Marathon in April and before or around my birthday in June! What better way to celebrate turing the big 30 than running for a whole day?

I cannot think of one ;)