Becoming A Mom

The day I found out I was going to be a mother, was one of the scariest and happiest days of my life.

I will never forget, I called my sister and told her the news first, she got excited. I was terrified and she calmed me down. It was a day I will always remember. I made a choice that day, that no matter what I did, no matter what happened, I would become a mom.

I did not want to be a mother, I wanted to be a mom. The kind of mom who was there for every single moment of my child's life. I promised that tiny baby growing inside of me that no matter what I would always be there to nourish them and care for them. That I took up the responsibility to protect them and keep them safe. And from that moment on I fell in love.

I will never forget the first time I saw that tiny baby swimming on the ultra sound screen, I cried a little bit that day. It became real, and the bigger the baby grew, the more my heart did.

When I found out I was having a girl, I got so excited. I went out that day and bought her first pink dress. Clearly I was planning to have a diva on my hands :)

What I did not plan for, the things I did not think would happen is this:

Becoming a Mom, meant changing my lifestyle. For the first time in years I had a renewed strength. I had a new spirit within myself. I knew that I wanted to give my daughter the best possible chance at a life. And not just an ordinary life, I want her to have a great life. One that I was not able to have. To do this, I knew I had to be great. I knew that if I wanted a child to strive for extra ordinary that I had to set that example.

And for me, that is what becoming a Mom gave me. It gave me the strength to stand up for myself. It gave me the will to fight. She, this tiny little child I had come to love and cherish needed me to stand up  and fight for her happiness, for her life. I knew that I wanted her to be a fighter. So I became one first.

So today, like all days I will hug and kiss her. I will tell her how much I love her. I will hold her in my arms and rock her to sleep singing her favorite songs. And I will be a Mom. The kind of Mom that I wish I had. The kind of Mom that I want her to be one day.

That is what becoming a Mom has been all about for me. It has been the best thing that could have ever happened to me. One day I will tell my daughter my story, I will always remind her that she saved me. It is the truth. Before she came I was walking down a dark path of different struggles. But the moment she entered into my life she made me want to change. She made me want to get healthy and change my life. She pulls me on to the right path and forces me out of bed every single day. For her I am eternally grateful. I know that she was sent to me from God to save me.

Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful women in my world who have inspired me along the way. I hope you had a wonderful day.