Friday, February 24, 2012
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy birthday to me,
Happy birthday dear healthy Colleen,
Happy birthday to you!
Yes today 2 years ago is the day I stepped onto the scale at Weight Watchers and found myself taking control of my life and deciding it was time to make some major changes. I decided that I did not want to look like this for the rest of me life:
I decided that being healthy and being a better mother and role model for my 6 month old were more important than anything in my life.
I decided that at the age of 26 needing an FSA plan to pay for medical bills and 7 medications a month was not the idea of a happy life style. Most importantly, I decided that for once in my life I had to find some things that made ME happy and start living for myself. I did not realize it at the time, but the things that made me healthy would make their way into making me happy.
I did not realize that day that my life would take many turns and twists, but that they would all lead me down a path in which I could stand up tall and proud and feel like I was accomplishing something great. I never imagined, how incredible life would get, or how the simple joys in life were standing right in front of me just waiting to be experienced. I did not realize that I could be happy, truly happy just by being able to do things I liked to do. I did not realize that I could smile just because.
Not all of this journey has been easy, in fact, most of it has been a daily dog fight in which I sometimes feel lost and alone. It was and still is hard to face the demons that live within in me, and try to pull me back down a darker path. Some days I wonder how I got here, and some days I feel like I really earned it. While still others I feel like I do not deserve it. It is a mixed big bag of emotions, it is a lot to take in and observe. But above it all I do know one thing is absolutely 100% certain:
I have not a single regret.
I have not a doubt in my mind that this is what I am meant to be and who I was meant to become.
Everything I have experienced over my life for the past 28 years has helped to shape me into the person I am today, and for that I cannot be anything but eternally grateful.
I am happy to be healthy, happy to be at a normal weight, and more importantly taking ZERO medications on a daily basis and smiling a whole hell of a lot more :)
Getting to my lifetime goal weight at Weight Watchers this year was an amazing accomplishment as well!!! And I am so excited to be a member for life :)
And I can be sure I will be chasing my grand kids around one day ;)
For now we will stick to nephews :)
And of course winning ultra marathons ;)