Wake Up the Competitor Within

Every time I discuss my journey I usually always get asked the same kinds of questions. Sometimes I am at a loss for words. Sometimes I cannot stop talking about it. But the farther along I seem to get, the more I have learned and realized about myself.

Recently I realized what drives me to keep going. You see for most of the past 10 years I was just merely existing. Taking up space on the couch, helping increase candy and prescription sales, eating myself into bad health. It sounds harsh, but it is really kind of the sad truth. I had nothing driving me I had nothing to push for.

Then I had a child and I thought that would do it. I thought once I became a 'mom' that I would feel less alone and have more motivation in life. Well funny thing is having a child made me feel worse for awhile. I sunk into a depression after she was born that clouded me for sometime. I loved being a mom but I did not love myself.

Then I decided I would start losing weight and working out and joined weight watchers the whole bit. And for sometime it was working the weight was coming off and I began to feel ok.

Then I started running. When I started running and really thinking about entering my first 5k it began to get exciting. All of a sudden I was doing something for me, just me. I was not a mom when I was out there running, I was not the chubby girl trying to lose weight. I was a runner and I was competitive.

I woke up the competitor within myself that I never knew existed. All of a sudden I began racing against myself and each week was a new challenge to get faster and run further than the week before.

And I was having fun too!! I started looking for races and I started dreaming big. I set my sights on a half marathon after 2 5ks and set a time goal, complete it in under 2 hours, and I worked hard for months to get there, and I did. And it felt amazing, I felt amazing. More importantly I was living for myself and doing something I never dreamed possible.

What keeps me going? That competitive edge within me. It drives my spirit when I'm tired, it makes me run when its cold, it keeps me going even when I may want to give up. It never says enough is enough. And I love the fact that it exists within me.

So I ask you what drives you? Have you found q competitor within you? Or is it something else? I have a friend who claims she just wants to look good naked. I love how she has found what works for her and embraces it.

Have you done that for yourself yet?

Marathon Training Week 15

Week 15!!! In 47 days I will be saying I am a marathoner :) I love it!

This week was actually kind of hard because I got sick and took some rest days. I have not taken 2 days off in a row this year. I know it sounds excessive but exercise is just a part of my daily routine and when I was sidelined this week it really upset me. But I am learning that my body is not a machine and it does need rest sometimes, and that rest is OK.

Mentally a rest day makes me insecure. I start to worry I will gain a million pounds, or my physical ability to run will diminish. I know in my rational mind that this is not true, but it just does not always click. It affects my mood when I cannot work out, it makes me slightly depressed. I am working on it ;)

Monday- I headed to the gym early in the morning and hit the bike for 8 miles in a half hour and then I did a weights workout for 20 minutes.

Tuesday- I was running a fever and not feeling well at all. I did not workout.

Wednesday- I thought for sure I would be ok to go workout, I got up early and got suited up for a run. Well 3 minutes into the run my chest was tight and I was coughing quite a bit. I thought about pushing through but then I thought about my bigger picture. I turned around and went home and went back to bed. I went to the doctor and was told I had a sinus infection.

Thursday- I was finally feeling better!! I headed to the gym after work for a nice 4 mile run on the treadmill! Then I did a quick crossfit workout.

Friday- I headed out with Peanut in the jogging stroller and did 3.5 miles. Then I headed in the house and did a core workout for 30 minutes.

Saturday- was a rest day

Sunday- I did my fifth and final half marathon for the year! It was rainy and cold but I smiled and recapped it all here :)

Smuttynose Rockfest Half Marathon Recap

I woke up at 5:30 AM full of excitement and anticipation as I headed out to Hampton New Hampshire for the Smuttynose Rockfest Half Marathon.

I live for race mornings. Have you realized this yet? hehe I really just love getting all fired up and getting out there and performing at my best and earning a medal :) Nothing brings me more joy personally than that well besides my family of course ;)

The weather. Can we talk about it? Well I guess there is not much to talk about. Just the fact that this was my 5th half marathon this year. This was the 3rd one where I was soaked during the entire race. Hyannis was snowing, Providence was pouring and Hampton was pouring hehe I do not think you want to race with me! I bring a curse of undesirable weather. But I was prepared. I train in it all the time and for this very reason, you never know what race day will bring!

I met with Damian and we hid in the car until it was time for the race to begin! The race was small about a few thousand runners so there was no traffic or long lines.

I got out about 8:35 and headed to the bathroom, that was strike number one. 6 bathrooms for all those people! I was waiting in line for 20 minutes that sucked. I was wearing my shorts and t shirt so I was frozen! My legs were all goosebumps and Damian said the little hairs on my face were standing up strait. I was cold! When you lose your fatty blanket you have been carrying around for 10 years you have a hard time adjusting to the cold.

This race would be beautiful on a nice day:

But of course it was not because I was there! Hahaha anyways

We headed over to the start area and it was rough. There was no big designated start line and everyone was just hanging out in a cluster. I did not even hear anything go off but all of a sudden people started running and we headed out to begin the race.

The first mile was dreadful. This race was disorganized and everyone was just all over the place in terms of running. There were people holding me up and there was little room to pass people. I got so frustrated I just wanted to settle into my pace but I could not until late in mile 2. Once I got into my rhythm I felt good. I took a walk break for 30 seconds at every mile marker. It helped my legs stay fresh!

I treated this more like a training run than a race and I realized that soon into it. At mile 5 I stopped quick to pee. I was cold and wet so I was not trying to hold a full bladder on top of all that! It helped because I was comfortable the rest of the race. At mile 5 I did a few Cliff shot blocks and drank some of my nuun. I ran with my fuel belt and I was glad I did. I like having my own water breaks when I need it.

I took a few more blocks at mile 10 and was feeling strong throughout the entire race. I had my nuun and I got water at 2 stops but I did not drink enough. I am guilty of this every time I run or even race in the rain! I do not know why but I do not get thirsty so in my mind I do not need to drink as much.

I felt good as I came onto the home stretch and passed mile 12. I realized as I was running that I have come so far this year. On Feb. 28 I ran my first half and was dead by the end of it. Now on Sunday as I was running this half I was not tired, I felt I could keep going. This is proof my marathon training is in full swing and working ;)

Post race! Wet and soggy but still smiling ;)

I was happy to have 5 half marathons completed this year!!! Not too shabby for a gal who could barely run a mile last year, or who could not climb a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing 2 years ago!

I got dry clothes and coffee and headed back to watch Damian.


The celebration continued as we waited for Damian to complete his FIRST half marathon!!!! He was doing well and he came in at 3:05! Just making his 3 hour completion goal he had set for himself!!!

I am so proud of him. He has lost 70 pounds this year!!! This was another person who huffed and puffed going upstairs and carried around his inhaler! He laughed at me right in my face last winter when I told him I was training for a half marathon. He said he may start running again after leaving it behind years ago. Then he laughed at me when I told him he too would run a half marathon with me!

Well he is still laughing but now it is becuase he has so much fun running :)

I have to thank our cheerleader Nicole! She refused to take a picture with us but its ok we will get her in 2 weeks as she completes a 5K with the rest of us!! She always comes out to watch us race and has been working on her own health journey and I am so proud of her!!!

I love spreading the joy of running and seeing it all come together at races :)

The race results are here.

5 half marathons done for the year!! Now I have one last big race to go :) My first Marathon in Philly on November 20!!!